


give me shelter (show me heart)

by kwrites



Category: Arrow (TV 2012)
Genre: AU, Angst, Camp AU, F/M, Fluff, High School AU, teenage drinking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-02
Updated: 2015-10-02
Packaged: 2018-04-24 10:06:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 15,236
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4915342
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kwrites/pseuds/kwrites
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>AU: It’s their final year as camp counselors at Victoria Springs and Oliver Queen is ready to move on to college and the next part of his life. So why can’t he stop thinking about last summer?</p>
            </blockquote>





	give me shelter (show me heart)

**Author's Note:**

> A week or so ago, I texted Jo (everythingilove) asking for an AU prompt to write a quick oneshot for. Y'know, to try to get the creative juices flowing. This extended longshot story is the result of her being a big Olicity AU bully (and how much we happen to love Young!Stephen). I feel like this story deserved 80k more words and a lot more backstory to it, but unfortunately I am incredibly busy and as I'm sure you all know, already have 2 multi-chapter WIPs that really need to be worked on - don't kill me. 
> 
> This story floats back and forth with the present and the past. The sections from the past are in italics.
> 
> Anywho, please let me know what you think, as always. I always enjoy constructive criticism. 
> 
> This work is un-beta'd, so any mistakes are my own.

“Have you seen this year’s incoming group? There is some amazing talent there.”

 

Oliver glanced up from his schedule, shooting his best friend Tommy a confused look. “What?”

 

“What is going on with you buddy?” Tommy’s eyes narrowed, his voice just a touch away from exasperated.

 

Oliver shrugged, folding the paper in his hands into a square before pushing it into his back pocket.

 

“Nothing is ‘up’ with me, Tommy.”

 

Tommy rolled his eyes. “You’ve been out of it the entire day, ever since we got here. I’m trying to inform you of the beautiful women that have taken residence on this very same campground as us for the next two months and what? You’re more interested in your activity schedule? Obviously something is up.”

 

Oliver sighed, closing his eyes briefly and willing himself to be a better liar, to be better at pretending.

 

It was he and Tommy’s third and final year as camp counselors at Victoria Springs, a co-ed summer camp nestled up in the mountains of the Northwest. They had both begun attending as campers when they were just 12 years old. Surprisingly, they had both fallen in love with their time there. And it truly had been a surprise. When they were sent away to camp by their parents who desperately needed time away from their “troublemaking”, no one had expected them to last the entire summer, let alone five more.

 

But they had both taken to it quickly. For Oliver, the summers had become a welcome reprieve from being “Oliver Queen” and everything that came with it. Being out of Starling, away from his fake friends (Not Tommy of course, no one knew Oliver the way he did), and all of the connotations that were part of it, had allowed him to be someone else - himself.

 

They attended for three years before moving up the ranks and deciding to become counselors themselves, not wanting to part with the camp they had grown to love so much. Now, at age 18, it was their last year as counselors before they would depart for college in the fall.

 

For Oliver, it was bittersweet. He couldn’t deny that it was time to move on and leave the place behind for something, somewhere new.

 

But the camp held a lot of memories of friends that had come and gone, learning experiences, his first kiss, first beer, first… well, you know. So many of the experiences that had shaped his childhood had been born out of this place.

 

Saying goodbye? It was a tough pill to swallow.

 

And then there was _her_. Felicity.

 

The current source of his anger, exhaustion and though he dared not admit it - pain. Because admitting he was in pain only made it worse. Only made the anger swell tighter and the knot in his stomach drop further. At the end of the day, after all, it was his fault.

 

So once again, he had taken the cowardly route. He had let the anger take over him, allowed it to settle and his twist his thoughts and actions. He was angry at himself, sure, but he was also angry at her. For pulling him in so deeply and for letting him run away so easily.

 

Pulling himself out of his self-induced funk, he knew it was time to push it back down. It was their last summer, and he certainly couldn’t spend the entire time pining over the beautiful girl he had run away from the previous summer. He had other things to do.

 

“Sorry, Tommy. I think I’m just still a little tired from the trip up here. Let’s go see what this new talent looks like.”

 

\---------

 

_Camp orientation finally complete, Felicity thought. It had been a tiresome three hour affair. Her decision to travel to Victoria Springs this summer had been a last-minute, impulse decision for her. Felicity didn’t do impulsive. Not usually._

_After a particularly exhausting fight with her mother over her desire to attend a college across the country, she knew she needed a break. Managing to get one of the last counselor positions available, she had jumped at the opportunity and well, here she was._

_That’s not to say she wasn’t excited, because she was, but she was also nervous. Hundreds of miles away in a place she had never been, who wouldn’t be at least somewhat nervous?_

_Lost in her thoughts, she didn’t notice the lone figure approaching until the voice rang out._

_“Felicity Smoak? I’m Oliver Queen.”_

_The soft sound to her left broke her train of thought and she turned, her breath catching in her throat at the sight of him._

_She had only been there for three hours and she had already heard the rumors around camp about Oliver Queen. Beautiful, sweet, athletic, jerk - they had swirled around the camp in a whirl of paradoxes and she hadn’t known what to make of them, of the mysterious Mr. Queen._

_Beautiful… yeah, that about summed it up, alright._

_He was tall and muscular, but not overly so. His hair was a dark blonde that lay slightly cropped on the sides, with some longer strands standing up straight. It was his bright blue eyes that really caught her attention. Piercing._

_“Of course I know who you are, you’re Oliver Queen. Beautiful, athletic counselor and all-around camp heart throb.”_

_“You think I’m beautiful?” His grin stretched his face, highlighted the dimples of his cheeks and she felt the most ridiculous feeling stretch across her… like a swoon. Ugh, did you really say all of that, Smoak?_

_“Yes, I mean no. I mean, those are just what the rumors around camp have been. And well, I’m new here, of course, so… rumors. All I had to go by. Pesky things, really.”_

_If anything, the grin on his face only grew wider, and really, this wasn’t fair. Because he was really, really hot. Like, stupidly hot. Like, why was he a camp counselor in the middle of the woods when he should be out modeling or acting, or doing something with that face? It was a face that needed to be seen._

_“Rumors. Right. Well, don’t believe everything you hear, except for the beautiful, athletic, intelligent rumors. You can believe all of those, if you’d like.” Her answering snort only made him continue to smile back at her. Seconds passed by before either of them broke eye contact. Felicity eventually broke first, unable to keep the blush from rising up her chest and onto her face._

_His throat clearing snapped her eyes back up to his own. “Right, anyways, as a senior counselor, I’ve been appointed to welcome you to the camp beyond the typical orientation. Y’know, show you around, answer any questions you might have. I’m your guy.”_

_She swallowed, her tongue feeling too big for her mouth as she looked at him in front of her. Being left alone with Oliver Queen sounded dangerous and Felicity Smoak didn’t do dangerous,  impulsive things._

_But maybe she was going to start._

 

\---------

 

He sees her again for the first time not long after his dramatic, internal monologue back in his and Tommy’s bunk. Seeing her shouldn’t take him by surprise, but it does.

 

For a second he had thought after everything that happened… Well, he hadn’t known what he had thought, but her deafening silence over the past year had spoken volumes. He hadn’t been sure if she would make an appearance this year.

 

Last year had been her first year as a counselor and her first year at the camp overall, so it wasn’t as though she had been coming every year, didn’t have the same commitment to the place as he and Tommy did.

 

She could’ve decided on another camp, or as it seemed more her preference, another country far, far away from him. If her refusal to answer his texts, calls - his fucking Facebook request - had meant anything - it was that she had no interest in ever seeing him again.

 

That hurt more than he ever would’ve imagined. Not that he dared to admit it to anyone.

 

He had tried so hard to fix things between them the last week of camp and shortly thereafter. The first month after camp, he had called her twice a day for an entire month. Countless texts in between. He had even managed to bribe Judy, the camp’s office manager, for her address to write to her. Afterall, everyone had seen the two of them together last year. They certainly hadn’t tried to hide their relationship. Their falling apart, however, had been less public. It wasn’t a stretch for Oliver to want to surprise his girlfriend during the time away from camp. _Ex-girlfriend, he thought miserably_.

 

But he was over it. Over her.

 

Felicity is coming out of the camp’s pseudo-library and computer room when they catch each other’s eye for the first time. The sun is hitting her hair, the golden waves tumbling around her face.  

 

 _Beautiful, as always_. The immediate thought hits him freely and without permission before he targets the anger once again.

 

He stumbles, stepping into Tommy’s back. He wishes he could say she looked as incomposed as he felt. But aside from a slight widening of her eyes, a dip of her mouth, she looks wholly unaffected. Completely uninterested in his presence.

 

The unwelcome ache in his chest grows wider.

 

\---------

 

_It took Felicity three days to realize that no one had ever appointed Oliver as her ‘welcomer’. No, he had taken that role upon himself. It took her only three minutes to realize she didn’t care._

_Oliver had really outdone himself that first day. True to his word, he had taken her to every building on the grounds, pointing out her station as the camp’s technology counselor, some of the athletic areas he worked on, and all of the other ins and outs._

_But showing her buildings and answering questions on schedules and food had been the least of what he had done._

_He had offered her his friendship and had brought her into the fold of the camp. Showing her his and Tommy’s favorite places to go when they were done with their courses, the best places to sneak away for beer when the older managers supplied (or when they snuck away long enough to use their Fake IDs). Oliver had made her feel like she belonged within 24 hours of stepping foot at Victoria Springs._

_Felicity knew it was cheesy, knew it was a cliche and didn’t know if he felt the same, but getting to know Oliver had been one of the easiest things she had ever done. Their conversation flowed easily, openly; he had a friendly face and a smile that was effortless to trust, despite all of the warning bells going off inside of her head._

_By the next day, Oliver had apparently felt at least a touch of that closeness, if his appearance at her bunk door at 8am, coffee in hand, said anything._

_Effortless. She thinks. Him being so cute really didn’t hurt either. Hey, she was allowed to be shallow from time to time, right?_

_It’s three days later when she finally pushes Oliver into admitting that no one had asked him to show her around that first day._

_“So, why’d you go out of your way to show a newbie around the place? I’m sure you had better things to do with your time then let me drag you around.”_

_Oliver’s cheeks, still pink from his previous admission, had reddened further at her question and she smiled at his adorableness. His head remained ducked for a moment longer before he raised his eyes, looking directly at her with a soft smile, full of wonder and disbelief._

_“Honestly Felicity, any ideas I had about my summer disappeared the moment I saw you.”_

 

\---------

 

The first night of every summer, the counselors and managers all hold a private dinner after the campers have had bites to eat in the rec hall cafeteria. The managers try to play it up as an exciting bonding experience, but everyone who has attended previously knows what it really is - work. They have to plan out their summer events, schedules and everything in between to “ensure a successful and smooth experience”.

 

Oliver and Tommy hate it. But Oliver especially. He would be perfectly fine with just being told where to go and where to be so he would know exactly when to duck out for the things he didn’t enjoy. Playing a part in the planning basically ensures his participation in almost everything, including chaperoning the two dances they have.

 

Yeah, he likes camp, but those he can do without. It was more fun when they were junior counselors and could sneak a few drinks. Now, not so much. Not that he ever would when he had younger kids under his supervision. He wasn’t that much of a degenerate.

 

Entering the rec hall, Oliver and Tommy head for their usual seats by the front of the stage. Senior Counselors usually sit together, which is why he is unpleasantly surprised to see Felicity at their table.

 

Gritting his teeth, he’s somewhat appeased by the less than amused look on her own face. If he has to suffer, why shouldn’t she?

 

Tommy, of course, ever the charmer, rushes forward to greet her, pissing him off even more. Whose side was he on? Probably his own.

 

“Felicity Smoak as I live and breathe! I wasn’t quite sure we would get to see your face around these parts after last, uh- last summer.” Tommy smiles at her lopsidedly, and Oliver’s chagrinned to see her smile back, standing up to allow herself to be pulled into a quick, but tight hug.

 

“Don’t be silly, Tommy. I would never let something that trivial stop me from coming back and seeing my favorite co-counselor.” She’s posturing, he knows, and the flirty smile she throws Tommy’s way only pisses Oliver off more. He snorts, eyes rolling up as he takes a seat on the opposite side of the table from her.

 

Felicity’s voice comes out snide, and so unlike how she used to speak to him. Back then it was soft voices and tender smiles. Now, not so much. “Something to say, Oliver?”

 

“Oh no, of course not. Why add to such a trivial conversation?” He’s snide. He guesses his own voice has changed too.

 

“You’re right, it would be best if you just didn’t say anything at all. Something I know you’re quite good at.”

 

Oliver’s throat burned with the words itching to be released but he keeps quiet instead, shooting her a cynical, dark smile before turning his attention to the front stage where Jessica, their head manager, has taken her place.

 

He lets himself drift off in his thoughts during Jessica’s typical welcome speech about camper safety, scheduling of courses and all of the usual items that needed to be addressed during a counselor welcome. At some point in the middle of it, she takes a break to allow everyone to grab food and he couldn’t be more grateful.

 

Felicity’s presence has him hyper-aware of nothing but her. Out of the corner of his eye, he can see every movement. The nail biting that is so Felicity, the anxious uncrossing and recrossing of her legs - a sure sign of her own boredom. He hates that these things are so familiar to him. The more he sits near her, the more irritable he becomes, to the point that almost bites Tommy’s head off when he shakes his shoulder.

 

“What?” Oliver is aware he almost spits the word, but his nerves are so shaken that he’s unable to reign it back.

 

“Woah, christ! What is wrong with you?” But Tommy’s head shakes, an exasperated look crossing his features. “Man, really? Felicity still gets under your skin this badly? You are in for a lo-oo-ng summer buddy.” Tommy’s voice is amused and Oliver shoots him an even dirtier look than before until Tommy’s hands are up in front of him in defense as he backs away to the food table.

 

“It’s nice to see you haven’t lost your charming touch, Oliver. Still as pleasant as ever.” Felicity’s voice hits him at the worst possible moment and he knows he’s being an ass, he knows it, but it doesn’t stop the words from falling out.

 

“Yeah? I guess you just bring out the best in me, Smoak.”

 

Oliver watches her face fall briefly and valiantly tries to ignore the clenching of his stomach. But just as quickly, her face hardens and she takes her seat once again.

 

He sighs deeply, wishing for anything that this dinner would fucking end. He isn’t so lucky. Because if anything, it only gets worse as it goes on.

 

When Jessica’s typical spiel ends, it’s time for everyone to begin brainstorming ideas for camp outings, parties and any other activities that fall outside of their normal schedules. Sure, they have a few events that happen every year, such as the 4th of July BBQ and hike up to the nearby falls, but they like to switch some things up for the campers who return year after year.

 

Those are where the real issues arise, because he and Felicity can’t agree on anything. And the soft spoken girl he had known last year had apparently become much bolder in their time away. God help him if it wasn’t sexy as hell, despite his anger.

_“How about a Karaoke night?” Felicity said to the group._

_Oliver scoffed, waving his hand in dismissal. “We’re supposed to be coming up with fun ideas. What about a bowling night?”_

_There are slight murmurs of approval before Felicity’s voice is rising again. “What, Oliver? How is that any different from the usual night you spend playing with your balls?”_

The night had only continued to go downhill before Jessica had exhaustedly called an end to the meeting, tired of watching the pinball machine that their bickering had morphed into.

 

Felicity bolted from the hall first, and Oliver, always a glutton for punishment, couldn’t help but follow after her. He couldn’t even tell you why he was running after her. After all, hadn’t it been him that had been praying for this nightmare to end? Why was he prolonging the torture?

 

“Felicity! Felicity, hey wait up! God damnit, why are you walking so fast?” The slam of the door behind him doesn’t put a pause in her step. If anything, he thinks she speeds up.

 

“I’m ignoring you, Oliver. Haven’t you had enough of this for one night?”

 

“What the hell is your problem, Felicity? Did you come back to camp this summer just to piss me off for two and a half months?”

 

That stops her. She halts almost comically fast and he can see her hands tighten into fists from ten feet away. He slows his pace, stopping quickly as she whirls around to face him.

 

Her blue eyes are shining back at him, her hair a little messy from the humidity and energy of the day. She still looks like the same girl he - the same he girl he left behind.

 

“Oh my god, you are so infuriating! Newsflash, Oliver! Not everything is about you. What, did you think I would stay away from here just because of what happened between us? I might not want to look at you, but I happen to enjoy it here.” Oliver admits that digs at him more than he likes.

 

But she’s still going. “I had a really great time here last year, aside from all of the other bullshit you dropped into my lap. This is my last year, last chance to erase all of the bad memories with good ones. So, yeah, I came back, and it has nothing to do with you. In fact, why don’t you just leave me alone? You did a bang up job of it before, you really shouldn’t have any trouble again.”

 

He’s a masochist. There can’t be any other explanation for it. Because she’s right. Why does he keep bringing it back to this?

 

“You’re right, Felicity. Right as always.” He says sardonically, shaking his head in disbelief at how stupid he is. “I’ll see you around.”

 

And then he’s gone.

 

\---------

 

_The next morning, to Felicity’s delight, Oliver shows up at her door with a sheepish smile and coffee. Again. Opening the door, she lets him in with a raised eyebrow and a small smile pulling at the corner of her lips._

_He looks nervous, as if he isn’t sure how she’ll continue to receive his appearance each morning. She honestly isn’t either, but right now? Right now she kind of likes seeing his stupid grin when she wakes up first thing in the morning._

_Must evaluate that thought later. Not right now. Not with Oliver looking warm and snuggly and ooookay._

_“That makes two of us, Felicity.” Her eyes widen as her gaze flits up to his eyes, taking in his mischievous smile and glittering eyes._

_“I said that out loud, huh?” Her cheeks burn._

_“Don’t worry, it’ll be our secret.” Oliver winked, and just like that, the nervous spell around them was broken and she felt like she could breathe again. “So, listen, are you really okay with me being here? Just showing up like this? I’m kind of an early riser and Tommy sleeps like the dead, so the mornings can get a little boring around here before my first sport.”_

_“Of course! Yeah, I mean, me too. I get up early too, and you’re bringing coffee so… you’re kind of my favorite alarm clock ever?”_

_He smiles then, happy, and she knows she’ll answer her door every morning if it means that smile will be directed at her._

_Felicity motions over to the side of her bunk, where the small table and chairs sit._

_It’s then that Oliver notices the lack of roommate. “Wait, where’s your roommate? You’re bunking with Sara, right?”_

_“Nope, Sara had a last minute emergency or something and had to cancel from attending this year. All the bunks had already been assigned so I got my own. Kind of neat, huh?” Felicity definitely thought it was more than neat. Not that she hadn’t been looking forward to making new friends, but the idea of room sharing hadn’t been the most exciting thing about the camp. So this was really a blessing._

_She isn’t sure if she imagines the slight darkening of Oliver’s eyes but she wonders if he’s having some of the same thoughts she had, last night. Of him sneaking into her bunk, watching movies, maybe kissing… She groaned internally, frustrated with herself for not the first time in the past few days since meeting Oliver Queen._

_She had NOT come here to meet a boy and have the cliched summer fling you read about in books or watched in movies. And she is pretty sure that Oliver Queen is the last guy that it should be happening with. But over the past few days of getting to know him, he wasn’t anything like the girls had spoken about. He was nice and charming and so far? He’d only had eyes for her. It was more than flattering._

_“Neat. Right, yeah, that’s definitely… the word I would use, too.” She knows she’s not imagining the rough tenor of his voice and she smiles back at him, realizing she’s not going to be able to stop what’s happening here between them. She realizes she doesn’t really want to._

_“So, what’s your first sport today?”_

_And just like that, they have a daily morning routine. Felicity knows that every morning at 7:30am, Oliver will knock on her door with a cup of medium-roast coffee, with light cream and two sugars. Just the way she told him she liked it the first day she met him. The first day he brought her coffee, she couldn’t believe he remembered it. She quickly learned that Oliver had somewhat of a photographic memory. He remembered almost everything._   


_Every morning she’d open the door, playfully frustrated at being woken up so early, but quickly dragging him by the arm into the cabin so they could discuss their plans for the day. What their schedules looked like, and if they had any down time they could spend together._

_It quickly becomes her favorite part of the day. Well, that and along with all of the other parts of her day that are spent with the unbearingly handsome Oliver Queen._

\---------

 

It’s a week and a half after the orientation meeting when they receive their hiking group assignments for next weekend’s trip to the falls.

 

Oliver hadn’t even had to look at the sheet posted in the rec hall to know who which counselor he was paired up with. He could hear Felicity’s loud voice coming from the side office, bits and pieces of the conversation seeping through the door. _Re-assign. I can’t-. Jessica, Please_. And then silence. He knew somehow it was her acceptance of the situation.

 

The door creaked open then, and she stepped out looking frazzled and annoyed. That look only increased when she caught sight of him. She seemed to steel herself, taking a deep breath before marching over to him.

 

“Listen, Oliver. We may be partnered up for the hike, but that doesn’t mean that we are going to be all buddy-buddy over s’mores. I’ll watch over one part of the group and you can watch over the other. That’s all.”

 

His mouth opened to reply, but she was brushing past him before he could get a word in.

 

“I guess we’re decided then.”

 

xxx

 

“I think we should take a left and go up the side trail. It looks like it rained recently and we might come across trees blocking the path.”

 

Felicity shook her head. “No, I don’t think we should deviate from the map. We should go the normal route.”

 

“Felicity, I’ve been coming to these falls for almost 6 years now. I think I know how to get there.” He was exasperated.

 

She snorted. “Well excuse me if I don’t always trust your judgment.”

 

Oliver shook his head, frustrated. He was sick and tired of being frustrated. Looking behind him, he could tell their campers were getting restless, even though many of them looked amused at their spat.

 

“Look, Felicity, I don’t want to argue with you. I just want to get everyone up there as quickly and safely as possible. If you want to go this route, fine, but I’m not going to waste my time and everyone else’s going back and forth about it.”

 

Finally, she looked contrite. He watched her look back at their group, seemingly coming to the same realization that he had. They were being ridiculous, which was fine on their own time, but not when it began to affect others - especially the younger campers.

 

Nodding over at him, her voice was softer. “We’ll follow your lead.”

 

He nodded back gratefully and they began the rest of their trek up the mountain. It wasn’t far from the campgrounds, barely a mile, and there were multiple signs leading the way. But he knew these woods like the back of his hand and he knew what happened after it rained. And it rained here often.

 

Within the hour they had finally reached the area they referred to simply as “the falls”. The first timers gasped and began muttering excitedly and Oliver finally found himself relaxing for the first time that day. He loved it here.

 

A large lake spread before them where it met the end of a higher mountain, water flowing freely down the side into it. The waterfall was one of the best features of the camp, and they made multiple hikes throughout the summer to spend the day or even sometimes camped overnight. It was hard to find anyone who disliked it.

 

Turning back to the group, he spoke. “Alright, everyone. Go ahead and put your stuff down and get settled. It looks like some of the other groups are approaching now as well. Then go ahead and jump in. Remember the safety rules. And don’t forget to have fun!”

 

There were nods of acquiescence and everyone dispersed excitedly. Looking over, he noticed Felicity staring at him, a confused look in her eye. Seconds later she must have noticed his own perusal of her because her cheeks pinked and she turned around quickly, moving to speak to one of the other counselors, Laurel.

 

He felt a nudge in his side and turned around, finding Tommy next to him. Grateful to see his familiar face, he smiled. “Hey buddy, what’s up?”

 

Tommy’s eyes glittered back at him and Oliver knew Tommy well enough to know that they were about to get themselves into some trouble, some way. Tommy leaned forward conspiratorially, and a small flask slipped out the side of his pocket, just barely peaking out.

 

“Let’s make one of our last falls trips memorable. Whaddya say?”

 

Oliver couldn’t agree more. And if it helped take his mind off a certain blonde that was never far from his thoughts, well, that was only an added bonus.

 

Two hours later, Oliver felt warm and toasty. He wasn’t drunk, no, he knew how to handle his liquor like a Queen and Tommy’s small flask wasn’t enough to knock him off his feet by any means. But he felt good. He and Tommy had just finished up a small match of volleyball, which had admittedly just turned into them halfheartedly hitting the ball back and forth over the net as Tommy regaled him with stories of the girl he had been hooking up with before they left Starling.

 

Coming back to the crowded side of the lake, a flash of blonde entered his eyesight, and he watched as Felicity jumped into the shallow waters. His throat tightened as she emerged, hair slicked down her back and his tongue felt too heavy for his mouth as he watched the water drip down her toned, tanned body.

 

Captivated by the individual drops running down the front of her revealing suit, it was Tommy’s whistle that broke him out of his stupor.

 

“Damn, Oliver. I know some serious shit went down between the two of you, but she is really a sight to behold.” Fuck.

 

Oliver did not need to be told that. Her eyes found his then, and he felt caught in her gaze. He didn’t think he was imagining the tint of heat in her eyes. Shaking his head, he called out to the a couple of the younger campers who were dunking each other under the water.

 

He might as well have been next to her in that lake, being pushed under water. Because he certainly felt like he was drowning.

 

\---------

 

_Felicity was nervous beyond belief. She couldn’t believe what she had done earlier. Her - Felicity Smoak, had actually point blank asked Oliver Queen on a date. Okay, maybe that was a bit of an exaggeration. But she had invited him back to her bunk to watch a movie on her tablet._

_Her bunk, where they’d be alone in the dark. Together._

_What on earth had she been thinking?_

_She hadn’t been. She’d lost all sense of rationale while watching Oliver play basketball in those fleece shorts, shirt lost somewhere on the grass and sweat dripping down his ridiculous abs. For what felt like the hundredth time in only a couple of short weeks, she asked herself why life was so unfair._

_Finishing his game, his eyes alighted on her before he made his way over, running a towel over his face and sporting a wide grin that had only gotten wider the closer he got to her. Unfair, unfair. It was a constant mantra in her head._

_“Hey, ‘licity. Did you enjoy the game? Me and Tommy kicked all those guy’s asses.” The pride in his voice was the only thing that kept her eyes from rolling at the smug grin on his face. Just barely. “Anyways, what are you doing later?”_

_She hummed, thinking about her plans. Or her lack of plans. “Nada… do you want to come over to my bunk and watch a movie?”_

_He was silent for a beat before agreeing enthusiastically. Squeezing her arm and promising to see her later, 8pm?, he was off before she could even consider taking back her invitation._

_xxx_

_“I invited you over, I should get to pick the movie.”_

_Oliver’s mouth twisted in a patient smile. “I don’t think that’s how it works, Felicity. I’m pretty sure as your guest, I should get to choose the movie.”_

_“How do you know I don’t only have one movie on my tablet and I’m just making you think you have a choice here?” It wasn’t that she really cared what movie they watched. They had to choose from her collection of movies, she obviously liked all of them in some capacity. She just really enjoyed giving Oliver a hard time._

_“Because you’re Felicity Smoak, tech gadget extraordinaire. There’s no way you only have one movie on there.”_

_Felicity’s arms crossed as she raised an eye at him. “Why are you so against letting me choose what movie we watch?”_

_“I don’t want to watch a chick flick, Felicity. I know I’m a sensitive guy and all but there are limits, even for me.” Was he whining?_

_Felicity rolled her eyes. “Who said I was going to choose a chick flick?”_

_He looked at her like she was slow, and she really wanted to smack him one. “I mean… isn’t that what all girls want to watch?” Men. Clueless._

_She sighed exasperatedly, pushing him towards her bed and grabbing her tablet from the wall it had been plugged into. “No, Oliver. I want to watch ‘Wet Hot American Summer’. So sit down on the bed and shut up before it’s midnight and we’re both too tired to watch it.”_

_His mouth dropped open in surprise. She wasn’t sure if it was the movie choice or the fact that she had just told him to get into her bed. Onto her bed. The latter was certainly making her a little nervous._

_“What? You can’t watch it from the top bunk, you wouldn’t be able to see. And I sure hope you don’t think we’re going to sit at the table in those wooden chairs to watch a two hour movie. It’ll be fine.” She hoped. “The bed is big enough for the both of us.”_

_He hadn’t moved a muscle during her entire speech but finally shook his head, looking at her in… admiration?_

_“It’s not the bed, Felicity. You don’t have to push me to get in bed with you, that I am happy to do.” He winked. “I’m just amazed at your movie choice. But I guess I shouldn’t be because you’re pretty remarkable.”_

_Felicity blushed, biting her lip and valiantly ignoring the way his gaze dropped down to her mouth at the action._

_“Well, thank you for remarking on it. Now get on my bed, Queen.”_

_His answering laugh warmed her skin and she smiled, turning off the lights before preparing the tablet stand next to the bed for them to begin the movie._

_An hour passes and Felicity is positive this is simultaneously the best and worst idea she has ever come up with._

_After attempting to sit by side, they had quickly realized there would be no comfort in the twin sized bed. It just wasn’t going to happen. It was Oliver that suggested she lean her back against him. Not seeing a better alternative, she had quietly agreed and they had fallen easily into each other, his broad back blanketing her own and making her feel comforted and protected in a way she had never known._

_It was nice, if she admitted it to herself. She had managed to get over her nerves for a while before he had begun his torment. He moved, jostling her on the bed with a quick ‘Sorry’, before settling back down, a hand sliding across her hip and pulling her back into him._

_Except his hand didn’t leave her side. It stayed planted, burning her skin and taking all focus away from the small screen in front of her. Moments later, his thumb touched bare skin and began moving in small circles. It was a movement so slight that if it had been anyone else, she may have thought they were unaware they were even doing it. Not Oliver._

_Up and down, left to right. His thumb moved softly around the skin of her hip and driving Felicity absolutely wild. He was barely touching her and she felt like her skin was too tight for her body._

_Seconds, minutes, passed. She wasn’t quite sure. All she knew was that she needed it to stop, or she needed more._

_Twisting her head over her shoulder, she found Oliver’s dark eyes already looking at her and her breath hitched in her throat. Their eyes locked and held, a silent battle of wills. Silently daring each other to be the first to make a move._

_His thumb picked back up for only a second before she realized was moving, her lips moving forward and settling comfortably over Oliver’s._

_He didn’t hesitate. His mouth opened under hers and she was lost in the soft feel of him all around her. His hand lifted to her neck, twisting her head to him even more and she opened her mouth wider in response. Their tongues met just as quickly, tangling in each other as they learned each other’s tastes. She couldn’t help the small moan that left her as Oliver sucked her bottom lip into his mouth, biting down softly._

_Oliver groaned in response and before she could realize what was happening, she was on her back underneath him. Staring up at him hovering above her, Felicity knew in that moment, she would do anything she had to in order to feel every part of him. Knew instantly, with his dark eyes searching her own and heavy breath washing over her face, that he would be her first._

_He must have seen something in her gaze, a decision maybe, because his mouth was back on hers in an instant. Rougher, more demanding than before and she opened up to him once again. Their legs tangled as his hips moved in between her own opened ones, his hands sliding up her neck to twist in her hair._

_She broke apart for air, and his mouth found purchase on her neck right away. Soft, wet kisses that were driving Felicity crazy._

_“Ah - oh god, Oliver. Please.” Was that her voice? She couldn’t even recognize it._

_His movements above her slowed, and he placed a kiss on her throat before moving back up to her lips to slowly kiss her once again. He pulled away then, looking at her seriously before pecking her lips once more and sliding his body off._

_“Oliver, wha - ..?”_

_He groaned, running a hand through his hair. “Look, Felicity. I really like you. More than I’ve ever liked a girl before. So, I think we should slow it down a bit because if we don’t then I don’t think I’m going to be able to stop myself from…”_

_“Is that such a bad thing?”_

_He snorted, looking down at her with a frustrated but amused look._

_“No, Felicity. It would definitely not be a bad thing but… I want to do this right and not the first time we ever kiss or anything. I should take you on a date, or something.”_

_He inhaled, getting control of himself before leaning down and pressing one last kiss to her lips._

_“I’ll see you tomorrow, ‘licity. Bright and early.”_

\---------

 

The week following the hiking trip is one of the most infuriating of Oliver’s life. Any truce that may have been established during the weekend had apparently been called off within seconds of them reaching the camp. He was convinced she had returned to the camp solely to make his life a living hell, no matter what she claimed.

 

When they had returned to the rec hall on Sunday night to discuss the trip and plans for the week, Jessica had brought up needing a second volunteer for that week’s Tot Meals. Tot Meals was simply a lame name for having to supervise the youngest campers while they ate. Felicity’s voice had rung out loud and clear.

 

_“I think Oliver mentioned to me that he was interested in participating, Jessica. I’m sure he’d love to help out!”_

_He turned to glare at her but Jessica’s bright smile brought forth a wave of guilt, and he attempted a smile in return._

_“Of course. I’d love to help out.” He was pretty sure the smile was a grimace._

_Looking back over at Felicity, he shot her a murderous look as she smiled coldly back at him._

 

On Monday, he accidentally slept in later than usual. Much later. At 8:10am he skidded into the rec hall, dying for a cup of coffee. He was informed that a certain blonde had just taken the last cup of the first breakfast shift. New coffee would not be ready until the second shift, which started at 8:45am. 15 minutes after his early morning run. Wonderful.

 

Nothing particularly eventful happened on Tuesday, except for that he saw Felicity talking to Barry Allen, one of the junior counselors. He was a nice kid, but the sight of him smiling dopily up at his girl, _not your girl, Queen, not anymore_ , left him feeling irritated and pissed off the entire day. Even Tommy’s offer to sneak out and drink beers by the lake was awash, and he settled into his bunk early, willing himself to be less affected by smart, scientific blondes and their younger counterparts.

 

The rest of the week passed in similar fashion. Bickering here and there about every unimportant thing under the sun. By Friday, Oliver was ready to report her to Jessica for inappropriate conduct. There hadn't been any, but he needed a reprieve from her constant antics.

 

Later that day, Tommy approached him about throwing a senior campfire. Senior campfires were notorious for two things. Beer and hooking up. Oliver couldn't name a single thing that sounded better at that moment. He definitely needed to relax and relieve some tension.

 

xxx

 

Oliver popped the tab on his Bud Light, settling down into the beach chair next to Tommy’s. He said a quick prayer to his and Tommy’s fake IDs and the fact that no one really seemed to care out in the middle of nowhere. It’s not like they were driving anywhere or hurting anyone.

 

The fire had been roaring for about thirty minutes, and he and Tommy had just finished dumping the beer into coolers, pouring the ice around them. There were only about 10 counselors in the camp, but usually some of the older campers got invited, and they tended to look the other way. They had been one of them a few years ago, right?

 

A tinkling laugh pulled his attention and he noticed Felicity walking over to the fire, Barry trailing slightly behind her and looking for the world like a lost puppy dog. He gritted his teeth at the adoring look in his eyes as he watched her.

 

She looked good though, he couldn’t deny it. Dressed in a pair of torn-up jean shorts, a black tank - which was showing more cleavage than Oliver was pleased with - and a loose flannel over it, she looked more than good. She looked sexy.

 

All of a sudden, he felt exhausted. He was too tired to fight the obvious anymore. He was still attracted to her, there was no getting around it.

 

He stifled a groan as she bent over to retrieve a beer from the cooler and her eyes caught his over the flames as she turned around. She raised an eye in challenge, but he didn’t care. His eyes never left her own. Shaking her head, a small smile stretched her lips and Oliver felt a tug in his chest.

 

It was the first time she had smiled at him all summer.

 

His eyes closed briefly before he turned to Tommy, shutting Felicity out. He saw the hurt look out of the corner of his eye before she moved on, taking her own seat next to Barry.

 

Oliver felt the tension leave him as the night wore on, everyone joking and having a good time around the fire. Even he and Felicity had managed to get over their earlier interaction, throwing some banter back and forth about mishaps from the previous summer. Beer after beer disappeared and he knew if he looked at the empty pile next to him he probably would be a little dismayed by the number of cans. If he could even count at that point.

 

Tommy had just passed his flask over when he noticed Barry scooting in close to Felicity. W _hat is that kid’s deal? As if someone like Felicity would ever be interested in him._ Oliver scoffed but realized he had no room to talk. Maybe Felicity’s type now was someone like Barry. The complete opposite of Oliver himself.

 

The thought stung.

 

He was enough for her once, before he went and ruined it. _Fuck_ , _would the self loathing ever get to a manageable point?_

 

He watched as Barry got closer and closer to her, and as he looked over Felicity, he could tell she was oblivious. Her eyes were wide and a little glassy and he knew she had not been going easy on the beer herself. The idea of Barry trying to take even the smallest advantage of her had Oliver’s blood boiling.

 

“Allen, don’t you think you should let the girl breathe? I’m sure your conversation about molecules and shit is incredibly exciting, but I don’t think Felicity was trying to go to sleep just quite yet.”

 

He felt a twinge of regret at the hurt look on his face. Barry really wasn’t the one to blame for this, he just happened to be caught in the middle of the two of them. He was about to apologize when Felicity spoke up.

 

“Felicity thinks she can speak for herself, Oliver. Stop pretending like you even care.”

 

The noise around the fire had abruptly come to a pause and as if just noticing the attention, Felicity’s eyes welled and she abruptly stood up, walking quickly away and into the woods.

 

Fuck.

 

He was up and out of his seat before he knew what he was doing. Walking quickly, he came up to a small clearing where she stood breathing heavily, her head in her hands.

 

“Felicity…” He was lost. When would they stop hurting each other? When would he stop hurting her?

 

“I don’t know what kind of sick pleasure you get out of hurting me Oliver, but it has to stop. I can’t - I can’t take it anymore. The end of last summer, I barely… I felt like I was never going to move past it, okay? Nothing hurt more than watching you walk away from us, from me. I came back here to prove that I was stronger than this, that we could move on.” Her voice was weak, broken, and Oliver had never felt as low as he did in this moment. “So why won’t you let me move on?”

 

Shaking his head, his hands gripped tight at his sides as he fought to control himself. But they had both been drinking all night and in the end, it was inevitable, he supposed.

 

And then he was walking ever closer and pulling her into his arms. She struggled at first, but he simply tightened his arms around her further, his hand on her neck pushing into her hair and pulling her impossibly closer to him.

 

“I don’t know, Felicity. I just, I get around you and I lose my mind.”

 

He could feel the tears seeping into his shirt and his own eyes clenched in pain. He never meant to do this. Any of this. The thought of hurting her… it was physically gut wrenching to him.

 

He continued. “I’m so sorry, Felicity. For last summer, for pushing you away when all I really was, was scared. I’m sorry for all of it.”

 

She sniffled, her hands clenched in his shirt. They stood for moments, both lost in the feel of finally being in the same orbit as each other once more.

 

Finally, she slowly pulled back, her blue eyes wet and wide as she took him in. His thumbs reached up of their own accord, wiping her tears and then before he knew it, his lips were touching hers for the first time in almost a year.

 

It felt like coming home.

 

\---------

 

_Felicity awoke the next morning smiling. It was perhaps the first morning all summer that she had woken up before her personal alarm clock had arrived to deliver her coffee._

_She was excited, she realized. Excited to see Oliver and to begin… whatever it was they seemed to be getting ready to begin._

_Like clockwork, the knock came a short five minutes later. She bounded up, pulling the door open with a grin. Oliver’s own happy grin met hers and she couldn’t remember a time she had ever been this happy._

_He chuckled seemingly amused at their ridiculousness. “May I come in, Miss. Smoak?”_

_“If you don’t, I’m going to drag you in here myself.”_

_He smiled, taking a couple of short steps in the doorway before pausing and turning around to capture her lips. She gasped in surprise and his tongue swept in quickly, their kiss turning passionate and rough within seconds._

_She moved to pull him closer but he was already pulling away, placing a soft kiss on her forehead._

_“Good morning.”_

_Her breath was short and she wanted more, but at the same time, she already had everything._

_xxx_

_Felicity combed hastily through her closet, her minimal wardrobe glaring back at her in distaste. When she had packed last-minute for camp, she had never in her wildest dreams even considered the possibility that she would need date clothes. But here she was, minutes from Oliver coming to her bunk to take her out._

_She had been skeptical, that was for sure. They were in the middle of nowhere, after all, and unless you snuck away in the middle of the night, it was really difficult to leave the camp grounds. But Oliver told her he would grab her at 4pm, leaving her with wild thoughts. Where would he take her? What would they do?_

_He refused to tell her the surprise, which only made her job of choosing an outfit infinitely more difficult. Huffing, she finally decided on a flowing floral dress that hugged her in all the right places. It was feminine but showed off her best assets, and most importantly, she felt comfortable in it._

_She was just finishing up her hair when he knocked on her door. It was kind of funny, she thought. She was always opening her door for him. Opening herself to him._

_He pulled her away from the cabin, the small basket in his hand giving her a clue to his plans,  and like she often did, she felt the smile overtake her as he pulled her through a well-beaten path to the side of the camp._

_Finally, they approached a familiar spot - Oliver’s favorite spot. He had briefly shown it to her the day he had given her a welcome tour, but it had been a quick pit stop in the full day he had planned. She hadn’t gotten to appreciate it very well._

_It was absolutely gorgeous, and she gasped as she looked out at the view._

_“Oliver, wow…”_

_He smiled in return, spreading out the blanket he had carried under his arm. “So, I wasn’t sure what you’d want, so I kind of stole a lot of food from the rec hall.”_

_She watched as he opened the basket, pulling out sandwiches, pasta salad, and other small assortments. It was the bottle of cheap red wine that really caught her eye._

_“How did you…”, but she stopped, shaking her head in amusement. “Right, you and Tommy’s fake IDs. You seem to use them quite often.”_

_He smirked, popping the bottle open and pulling two plastic cups out of the basket. “Hey, if you have them, why not use them? Anyways, we usually try to stock up the couple of times we go out and buy so we don’t have to worry about running out.” He scratched his neck, looking sheepish. “I bought this bottle the first time we went to the store after meeting you.”_

_Oh, Oliver. He was making it too easy to fall for him. And she was. Falling for him. She had tried to hard to fight it, to let things just happen. But all that had done was lead her straight to him._

_He passed her a glass and she raised it in a toast, her other hand reaching to tangle in his. He squeezed her hand in response and she smiled. “Cheers to us, I suppose. God, that was cheesy,” she laughed, “I just want to thank you, Oliver.”_

_“For what?” He looked confused._

_She bit her lip, looking up at him under her lashes. “For, well, everything. For showing me around, for making me feel like I belonged, for daily coffee delivered to straight to my door.” Her eyes were laughing and his dopey grin only inflamed her more._

_“And for giving me a summer I will never forget.”_

 

\---------

 

It’s been four days since their lips had met in the forest.

 

Since his tongue had tangled with Felicity’s, soaking in her taste and pulling a soft moan from her for the first time in almost a year. It was familiar and foreign all at the same time. It was better than he remembered.

 

Which was why, four days later, he was still avoiding her. After minutes of losing themselves in each other, Felicity had finally pushed him back, a look of desire mixed with fear apparent in her eyes. She had taken one long look at him before muttering a quiet “Sorry”, and disappearing towards her cabin.

 

Oliver hadn’t moved from the spot, spending seconds, minutes, trying to piece together what had just happened there. The feelings of guilt and desire were suffocating, and he had eventually wandered back towards the fire, losing himself in the contents of Tommy’s flask.

 

He had woken up with a searing hangover and a ten pound weight in his stomach. It couldn’t happen again. He wouldn’t hurt her anymore. He knew neither of them had been sober the previous night, but the look on her face… he never wanted to be the cause of it ever again.

 

So, that was it. He would keep his distance until enough time had passed. Until they could look at each other without a sea of hurt.

 

Sometimes he wondered if it would ever be possible.

 

xxx

 

“Oliver, get up man. You overslept. It’s almost 10am.” Tommy’s voice pulled at his subconscious.

 

Oliver groaned, pushing head further into his pillow. It was Saturday, who cared?

 

Tommy was nothing if not persistent and the pillow that smacked down upon his head agreed. “Ow, what the fuck?”

 

“What is with you? You are always up at the ass crack of dawn. Normally, I would be encouraging you to sleep in, but this has been going on for days now, Oliver. And uh, in case you forgot, the volleyball tournament is today? You know, the one you’re overseeing?”

 

That opened Oliver’s eyes. Fuck.

 

He had been sleeping in later than usual this past week. Ever since the incidence in the woods. Exhausted was a nice way of putting how Oliver had felt lately.

 

But he had a commitment to the counselor volleyball tournament, so he pulled himself up and ignored the skeptical look he was receiving from his best friend.

 

Twenty minutes later, he was approaching the camp’s beach volleyball field. Field was kind of an exaggeration. It was more a large plot of sand, with two separate nets side by side. Every summer, they tried to have a counselor tournament to “encourage camaraderie” and provide entertainment to the rest of the camp. Those who chose not to participate usually helped by setting up drink and food stands to help provide other incentives for those not interested in sports.

 

This year, he was in charge of teams, field set-up, and ensuring the games ran smoothly. He’s pretty sure he was chosen this year after he had decimated all of the competition last year. Yeah, he’s still smug about that.

 

It takes him about forty-five minutes to make sure everything is in it’s right place and another thirty before the tournament officially starts. They play two games at once, as there are three rounds per game, and no one, especially not Oliver, wants to be there all day long.

 

Oliver spends the majority of his day caught between refereeing and trying not to be obvious about the fact that he can’t take his eyes off of Felicity.

 

She looked damn good, though.

 

Ever since the other night, they had come to some sort of silent truce. They weren’t perfect, far from it, but the animosity and bickering that had been present at the beginning of camp had been shelved for small looks and barely there smiles. He had no clue what was going on but anything was better than how they had been.

 

He watches her play with a smile. While certainly not the most athletic person he had ever met, she had a wicked serve and had been killing it for her team. The tight, neon pink, spandex shorts gracing her strong thighs were not anything to ignore either. She looked healthy and happy, and that was the biggest turn on for him.

 

Those feelings are all but forgotten ten minutes later, when Felicity goes up for a ridiculous spike, one she never should’ve been a part of, and comes down on her ankle. The sharp cry of pain snaps Oliver into motion in the blink of an eye.

 

If you ask him later, he’ll have a difficult time describing the events surrounding it. Picking her up, ignoring her sullen protests that die down quickly, the pain in her ankle becoming too much for her to ignore. The feel of her hand grasping his shirt front as he carries her to the medic, her face turning into his neck. He swears he felt her lips graze him, felt her inhale and breathe him in. And laying her down on the bed, ignoring the protests of the nurse trying to shoo him out of the med cabin.

 

He can’t leave her, he won’t. Not until he knows she is ok.

 

“Oliver, _really_ \- you can leave now. It hurts but there’s nothing you can do. I’m not dying, for god’s sake.” Felicity waved him away.

 

He knows it’s stupid, it’s just an ankle sprain. But after everything they’ve been through, last summer and recently, he feels like he owes it to her to show her that he can be there for her. That he wants to be.

 

“Felicity, this cabin is musky and smells terrible,” he shot an apologetic glance at Mike, the disgruntled health supervisor on staff, “and I’m not going to leave you alone in here. How are you going to get back to your cabin?”

 

“Uh, I don’t know, they have this new fangled wooden technology called crutches?”

 

He gasped in mock disgust. “How pedestrian. Besides, there’s rocks and shit and you could trip and fall over…” His voice trailed off as he caught the look on her face.

 

“Oliver, really, you’re being ridiculous. I’ll be fine and I’m sure that Mike or someone can help me back to my bunk, it’s really not a big deal. You need to get back to your games anyways, and I’m sure you have better things to do than - ”

 

“Felicity!”

 

Felicity stopped immediately, her eyes widening at the command in his voice.

 

“I’m sorry, I just… Please let me be here for you, okay? I know this past week has been really hard on you, on me too, and I just would like to sit here and know that you’re okay.”

 

He watched her breath catch, her wide eyes liquify and he felt his own breath tremble.

 

_How does she still have so much power over me? God, you’re embarrassing, Queen._

“Okay.” Felicity said, voice small.

 

“Okay.”

 

His response brings with it a smile that leaves him feeling lighter than he has all summer, and when he brings her back to her bunk later that evening - carrying her, of course - he falls asleep in a chair next to her bed. She barely even protests.

 

xxx

 

Oliver wakes three hours later with a crick in his neck. He groaned, a hand moving to rub at his sore muscles as his eyes opened, taking in his surroundings.

 

Immediately, his eyes flit on the bed, and with her asleep, her allows himself to really look at her. In sleep, she looked peaceful. None of the stress from the day’s events are present on her features and with that peace of mind, his eyes drift closed again in his own exhaustion.

 

xxx

 

He comes to again another hour later, and before opening his eyes he knows this time he really needs to get up. His own bunk, with his own bed are not far from there. He shouldn’t have fallen asleep here. Wasn’t it just days ago that he had promised himself he would stop doing this?

 

It’s so fucking hard though, he thinks miserably. Now that the anger has ebbed, he’s been able to admit what was staring himself so plainly in the face. He just wants her, and he’s so sick of denying himself of her. But he knows there will never be anything, not even if the possibility of anything, until they talk.  

 

His eyes open finally, moments later, and he jumps in surprise to see Felicity’s blue eyes staring back at him.

  
“You scared the crap out of me, Felicity!”

 

She snorted. “How do you think I felt when I woke up?”

 

He frowned. “I’m sorry, I should really get going. I guess with the day’s events, we just kind of passed out, huh?” He smiled at her sadly. She nodded briefly, but that was the only response he received.

 

Better than nothing, right?

 

“I’ll just go, then.” Standing, he takes a quick second to stretch, the strain of sleeping sitting up in a wooden chair wreaking havoc on his already sore back.

 

He’s just reached the door when he turns back around suddenly. Felicity is still staring at him, and she doesn’t seem surprised that he’s stopped again before leaving.

 

“Felicity, about last summer,” he began.

 

“Oliver... no. I really can’t do this right now. I know, I know that we need to talk and I shouldn’t have ignored you at the end of last summer when you tried. But I was really hurt by how you treated me after, well. You know.” She stops to take a deep breath and Oliver suddenly wants nothing more than for this to end.

 

“It took me a really long time to move past that. So, I know we need to talk, but now is not the time, okay?”

 

He’s quiet. “Okay. For what it’s worth, I really am sorry.”

 

“Me too.”

 

\---------

 

_In the blink of an eye it’s the fourth of July, and Felicity learns quickly that Oliver is very, very enthusiastic about the holiday. It’s almost worrisome._

_“I’ve never really understood the hype behind the holiday,” she had shrugged, “I mean, I love BBQ’s as much as the next girl, but blowing things up? I’ll pass.”_

_Oliver gasped, looking at her like she had two heads. “Felicity Smoak, I’m going to pretend like I didn’t just hear you say that - that blasphemy.”_

_Rolling her eyes she asked dramatically, “What? Why do you love it so much? Explain the fourth of July mythos to me, baby.”_

_She had been taken aback by the fire that Oliver had possessed when talking about BBQs, swimming, the occasional beer, and kissing a pretty girl under the fireworks._

_Okay, she had thought. Maybe this was something she could get behind._

_She had no idea how much fourth of July would change her life._

_xxx_

_Later that night, after the camp BBQ and excitement of the day, Oliver had told her to grab a blanket and meet him at what had become “their spot”._

_Felicity couldn’t deny that she had enjoyed herself tremendously that day. She was happy - giddy almost, as she made her way up to the oversee. Over the past two weeks she had learned time and time again what an amazing boyfriend Oliver Queen made. He was attentive and sweet, and listened to her with a sharp focus that was almost intimidating._

_She loved him, and she was going to tell him tonight, she decided. She didn’t want to keep it in any longer. She had almost blurted it out the other morning when they had gotten carried away in her bed, his shirt falling off (okay, she ripped it off) as she explored his warm skin. Her lips had made their way up his neck and to his ear, where the words almost fell over._

_It has physically pained her to reign them back, and that was when she knew. Knew she never wanted to have to. He deserved to know._

_She reached the top and spotted him sitting down on a blanket, his legs stretched in front him as he leaned back, taking in the stars and the fireworks coming from the camp side below._

_“Come here often?” She said, coming to a stop next to him._

_He looked up at her with a bright smile, his eyes hazy with sleep and the few beers she had seen him have at the party. “Only when I know beautiful girls are going to join me. Now sit that pretty butt of yours down.”_

_She rolled her eyes but the smile on her face betrayed her. She stretched out her own blanket next to him and sat delicately, her hand slipping into his own with the practice and ease that only came with being truly comfortable with another person._

_“So, I know fourth of July is a horrible holiday, but did you enjoy yourself?”_

_She hated when he gave her the soft voice. It made her all gooey inside._

_“I loved it,” she said, squeezing his hand, “You’ve made a convert of me after all, Queen.”_

_“Good.” He whispered, before she felt his lips lay over her own. They moved softly at first, his mouth covering her own with a practiced intensity as he mapped out every inch of her. No part was left unconquered._

_God he felt good, she thought. And he did, all strong and sturdy underneath her hands. She could still smell a slight whiff of the cologne he had sprayed earlier, mixed in with fire and the woodsy scent of camp. Pure Oliver._

_His hand tightened around her own and she felt his other reach up to cup the back of her neck, as he pulled her closer and his tongue traced her lips, increasing in pressure as their kiss grew more passionate._

_Her hands moved over his back, her fingernails scratching lightly down his spine. She moaned into his mouth as his lower lip teased her own and her nails bit down tighter in response. They moved then, as Oliver guided her down onto the blankets, his hips fitting perfectly in between he V of her thighs._

_His mouth moved off, whispering kisses placed down the line of her throat and she felt herself growing damp, her lower half pulsing with need. She rocked up into him on instinct and Oliver groaned throatily, moving down to take her lips again before her hands pushed up on his shoulders._

_He moved off slightly, confused and a little alarmed._

_“What, what’s wrong baby?”_

_She shook her head. “Nothing, Oliver, nothing, I just… I need to tell you something.”_

_He said nothing, just looked at her patiently. She could feel her insides twisting and gnawing but this was it. No going back._

_Her mouth opened and closed and then opened again. “I know it’s super quick and you don’t have to say it back, but I just, I love you. There, I said it. I love you, Oliv-”_

_She gasped as his mouth took hers voraciously, his lip biting into hers as his hands tightened on her hips. His kiss was passionate but quick and then he pulled off long enough to say, “I love you so much, Felicity. So fucking much,” before he was all over her again._

_She felt wild and frenzied and she had never felt more free._

_She laughed into his mouth, unable to keep the happiness from bubbling up and he pulled away with a scowl. “Don’t,” kiss, “you,” kiss, “ever,” kiss, “laugh,” kiss, “while kissing,” kiss, “me.”_

_He planted his lips all over her face and their eyes caught, and Felicity was shocked at how they seemed to be mirror images of each other._

_Okay, she thought, enough of the fluff. Time to get to the good stuff._

_She pulled him back down, before swinging a leg over him and turning him onto his back. He looked up at her in surprise, but the arousal soon takes over and she can feel him harden underneath her. It’s unbearingly hot and she experimentally grinds back down on him._

_“Fuck, Felicity, I can’t stop. You feel too good.”_

_“Don’t stop. Never stop.”_

_They’re lost in each other then._

_His mouth fused to hers, his hands sliding from her back to her stomach, slipping underneath until he found flesh. Before she can comprehend, his hands have pushed her shirt up and over her head, and it’s thrown hastily to the side._

_With a few sloppy tugs, her bra is off and her nipples are bared for him. Her hands reached to cover them, no one had ever seen her this exposed, but he stops her immediately with a whispered, “Don’t. You’re beautiful, Felicity.”_

_His lips moved up to wrap around her nipple, and she tightened her hands in his hair, her pelvis rocking into his as the pressure heats her up down below. Oliver moaned, lips unattaching from her breast long enough to turn her back onto her back._

_She pushed him off moments later and her hands moving to the clasp of his jeans impatiently._

_“Off, I need these off.”_

_His hand closed around hers as he asked one more time. “Are you sure?”_

_Her answer was a searing kiss that had Oliver pushing his own jeans and boxers off embarrassingly fast, and she moved to pull at the zipper and button on her own shorts. They’re half way off before Oliver’s hands are sliding them off the rest of the way and then he’s there, hardness pressing into her thigh._

_His left hand holds a condom that he must’ve pulled from his pants as he was taking them off, and she watched him slide it on, taking in the action for the first time. She had never seen it outside of health class before. Before she gets lost in her thoughts he’s there again, his hands are lifting up her back slightly and her legs raise to wrap around his hips._

_“Are you ready?” Oliver said quietly, though his voice was soft it is filled with confidence and determination and she knew he wanted this just as much as she did._

_With that thought, she tightened her legs around him, pushed her feet into his ass and pulled him closer._

_“Yes, just, go slow.”_

_He pressed a soft kiss against her lips and then she felt his head push in slowly. He slid in slowly, letting her adjust to the width and feel of him and he comes to a stop just before the barrier of her virginity._

_“I love you, ‘licity.”_

_And then he pushed in. She gasped, the unfamiliar feeling bringing warring emotions of pleasure and pain. The groan above her echoed through her ears and she knows he’s fighting with himself not to move._

_Seconds pass, maybe a minute before the pain gives way to an incredibly feeling of fullness._

_“It’s okay, I’m okay.” She whispered._

_Oliver’s hands dug tighter into her hips and he begins to push and pull her, moving at a faster pace. The feeling is incredible, amazing and Felicity feels the pleasure begin - begins to understand what all of the talk is about. She felt powerful, looking up at him, his eyes tight with desire, knowing that she could do this to him._

_Her legs tightened around his waist, and her hands moved up to run up and down his arms, a moan dropping from her lips._

_“Ah, Oliver, please. More, please, Oliver.”_

_“Fuck, I love hearing my name drop from your lips.” He groaned._

_After moments, his grunts and gasps increase in sound and his hips move faster, pushing into her with force. He’s deeper than she ever thought possible and it feels so right, so good. Then a hand is running down below as Oliver presses his finger into her._

_She feels goosebumps arise on her skin, and her feet begin to tingle as the feeling moves up her legs. She feels his finger moving in and out for a second longer and then he’s pressing down on her clit and she’s shattering around him, her walls contracting around him._

_“Oh, god, you feel so good, baby. I’m gonna -”_

_Two, three more pushes in and he slams forward one last time, pulsing into her with a long moan into her neck. They’re silent for minutes, Oliver’s hand running slowly up and down her arm as they recover around each other._

_Finally, Oliver pulled back, pressing a soft kiss into her neck and then onto her lips. “That was amazing. You are so amazing.”_

_She can’t answer, the emotions swirling within her make her feel like she’s about to explode. She had always been one to feel things more deeply than others, but nothing has ever been like this before. She pulls him closer, hugging him tightly and hoping, just hoping, she might get to keep him forever._

\---------

 

It’s a few days after the tournament and they’ve fallen into the same pattern. This time, it’s Felicity that is avoiding him. He thinks she knows that the next time they’re alone together, it will be time to talk. To confront their past and lay it to rest. The thing is, Oliver no longer thinks he wants to do any such thing.

 

Sure, they’re already halfway through the summer and then they’ll be leaving, off to college in the fall. He has no idea what will come with that, but he knows that if he doesn’t try to see what he and Felicity could be? He’ll regret it for the rest of his life.

 

He finally catches her that night, heading out of her bunk. He isn’t ashamed to say he waited nearby to make sure she was unable to run away from him this time.

 

Unsurprisingly, she doesn’t seem all that happy to see him. In fact, he detects a hint of fear on her face. He watched her stammer through excuses before he finally learned the truth.

 

_“I haven’t been avoiding you, I’ve just been busy.”_

_“Well, I’ve been kind of laying low with my bum ankle and everything, so…”_

_“I really have to go though, I’m going to be late.”_

It’s then that he interrupted.

 

“Late? For what?”

 

She looked stumped, defeated. She obviously did not want to tell him, which only served to make him more suspicious.

 

“Look, I’m going to hang out with Barry.” Finally, an admittance.

 

“Barry?” He stumbled over the name, as though he had forgotten the kid existed.

 

It had been a long time since anyone else mattered.

 

“Yeah, I told him we’d watch a movie so, I really should get going.”

 

Felicity’s gone not long after, her crutches moving faster than Oliver would’ve believed she could maneuver them.

 

The jealousy gnaws and grows, eating away at his resolve.

 

xxx

 

Oliver looked around the field, leaning back on the blanket underneath him. It was “movie night”, meaning the camp set up a large projector out on the main field and played a wholesome, family movie for the entire camp to enjoy. Oliver typically wouldn’t have attended, but he had absolutely nothing better to do.

 

_How fucking sad, Queen._

At least Tommy was there with him. Although he suspected he would not be there for much longer, if the looks he was shooting at Laurel, one of the junior counselors, was anything to go by.

 

He leaned back, catching Felicity and Barry sitting on a blanket a few rows up. A frown marred his face as he considered how often he had seen the two of them together in the past few days, ever since running into her outside her cabin. It seemed almost constant.

 

Was she doing it on purpose? He didn’t know, but he was starting to get a little ticked off. As much as she denied it, she knew she was avoiding him and he was over it. They needed to talk and it needed to be sooner rather than later.

 

They - _he_ , was running out of time.

 

It was halfway through the movie when he saw Barry lean into her out of the corner of his eye. No. That was not fucking happening. Not on his watch.

 

He stomped over, ignoring the wide eyes and whispers of those around them. He cleared his throat, meeting Felicity’s angry stare head on.

 

“Felicity, can I speak with you? _Privately_.”

 

Yep, she looked pissed. “Not now, Oliver. You’re causing a scene.”

 

“I don’t care,” he shrugged, “I need to speak with you. Now.”

 

She leaned over, apologizing to Barry before she stood, stalking off the field towards the rec hall.

 

When they were far away enough from the crowds, she spoke. “Okay, Oliver. Here I am. What was so important that it couldn’t wait til the end of the movie?”

 

“I just, I saw you -”.

 

“And what, decided that tonight was as good as any to be an asshole?” She interrupted, eyes blazing.

 

“No, look I - I saw you and him. I saw him… and I can’t do this, Felicity. I can’t stand on the sidelines anymore and pretend that I don’t care, that this isn’t killing me.”

 

She looked back at him sadly, but she was still angry and he knew immediately he would not like what she had to say.

 

“I’m sorry, Oliver. The last thing I want… I don’t want to hurt you, really. But I’m still not ready to talk about this with you and Barry, he’s just…” she stopped, shaking her head and looking off into the woods, like it held the answers she seeked.

 

He sighed, his hands burrowing in his pockets. “Okay… when will you be ready?”

 

“I honestly don’t know.”

 

\---------

 

_Felicity frowned as she watched Oliver playing a game of tag football with the guys, wondering what was going on with him. Ever since the day after fourth of July, he had been acting strange… off. Distant._

_He tried to play it off as stress, being tired, - the list of excuses went on, could fill an entire room. It was suffocating her, watching him pull away. She was just so confused. What had she done? Their night had been beautiful, perfect even._

_The next day when he had shown up at her door, he had been withdrawn, sullen. He placed a chaste kiss on her lips, and handed her coffee. He stuck around but it was brief, their conversation short._

_It went on much the same for the next week. Barely-there glances, the kisses and touches became almost non-existent. And they certainly hadn’t had sex again. The insecurity grew teeth and gnawed within her._

_And then that morning, he hadn’t shown up at her door. No coffee, no hello. She hadn’t even spoken to him all day. She had gone to his cabin, hoping, praying that he had just been sick. But he hadn’t been there, Tommy had shrugged saying he had mentioned something about catching a game of ball with the guys._

_She watched the game until they finished up, and made her way over to Oliver, ready to confront him. He was pulling a new shirt over his head when she caught up to him._

_“Oliver. Hey.”_

_He looked at her in a way she had never experienced. Empty, almost cold. “Hey.”_

_“What’s up? I missed you at my door this morning....” she trailed off, waiting for a plausible excuse, anything to stop what she knew in her heart to be inevitable._

_He shrugged. “Yeah, sorry about that. I told some of the guys I’d meet them out here for a game this morning._

_“Okay… why didn’t you let me know?”_

_He looked annoyed and she found herself growing angry. What right did he have to be annoyed? “Sorry, it happened last minute. I didn’t really think you’d mind.”_

_“Alright, what is going on with you Oliver? You’ve been weird and distant and icky all week. Is it me? Did I… do something?” Her voice came out soft, trembling. Get a grip, Felicity. Just, make it through whatever he has to say._

_She thinks she sees a flash of pain in his eyes, but it’s gone just as quickly, the shutters falling down once more._

_“Look, this isn’t the best place to do this. Let’s catch up later.” He moved to leave, but she stops him, grabbing his arm. She’s happy to feel his pulse racing with hers._

_“No. Say what you have to say Oliver.”_

_Oliver bit his lip and then looked at her steely. “Felicity, I really… I care about you. But, I don’t think we should do this anymore.”_

_Her mouth dropped. “What? What are you - what do you mean?”_

_“This. Us. Summer is almost over and then we’re going to go home, separately. We won’t see each other at all and, I just think we should end it now before it becomes more than it is.”_

_Her heart’s pounding and she feels dizzy, unwilling to believe that her Oliver could say this. Just after…_

_“No, Oliver. You’re not thinking clearly, you can’t mean this.” She’s grasping at straws._

_“I do mean it, Felicity. I’m sorry.”_

_He’s gone, walking away from her. She doesn’t know how long she stands on the court, unseeing and still in shock._

_She crumbles._

_xxx_

_As her parent’s car rolls down the road, taking her far away from Victoria Springs, Felicity considers the last three weeks of her time there. It was three weeks ago that Oliver left her standing in the middle of a basketball court, her heart on the ground._

_She isn’t happy to admit that she spent the first week almost inconsolable. In public, she kept up appearances, sure. As best as she could, anyways. But in her off time, she spent a lot of time memorizing the walls of her bunk, replaying their night together over and over. Analyzing every second, trying to pick it apart and find where the the thread unraveled._

_It’s not her proudest moment._

_At the end of the week, she realized who she was. She wasn’t going to be the type of girl that let a boy ruin her. She spends that week picking herself back up, learning how to steel her heart from the tendrils of love that Oliver had sewn together._

_She lets a few stray tears fall, but in all - it gets easier._

_It’s the third week that he comes to her in the midst of goodbye parties and end of summer nostalgia. He plead, begged, to speak with her. She was whole again - for the most part - but she didn’t want to speak to him. Not then, not ever again._

_She didn’t trust herself in his presence._

_She didn’t want to fall apart again._

_She spends the entire year convincing herself that she was completely whole to begin with._

\---------

 

The fourth of July brings a dull wave of pain as the memories of the previous year weigh heavily upon Oliver; The night his life truly felt like it had begun, only to fall apart somewhere around 2am, as he lay awake in his bed.

 

He knows he has a lot to answer for. He’s ready to do so. Has been ever since the end of last summer, when he had finally managed to pull his head out of his ass again. It had been too late then, but he refuses to let the second chance slip away.

 

The beginning of the day is spent as it usually is on the holiday - swimming in the lake, hot dogs, burgers - all things that used to make it his favorite holiday.

 

He doesn’t know if it feels the same way anymore.

 

Hours later, he watches Felicity sneak a couple of cups of red wine as the BBQ goes on. The sun is setting, hitting her smiling face at just the right angle, and it makes him smile amongst his own sadness. He wonders if she’s drinking because she feels it too.

 

He had hoped to speak with her sooner, but every time he had tried, Barry had been by her side. He tried not to be aggravated, but he falls short of those pleasantries.

 

Oliver catches her eye then suddenly, meeting and holding over the newly built fire and the smoke billowing above. His eyes burn and he tells himself that it’s the cause. He’s become a better liar than ever.

 

She nods her head to the side, standing up and signaling for him to follow. His interest is piqued. It’s the first time in a long time that she has initiated anything between the two of them.

 

They walk silently, and after a few minutes of walking, he realizes she’s leading him up to the oversee. His heart pounds, unsure if he’s ready to be back here. He hadn’t step foot in his favorite hideaway since that night. It held too much meaning to him to tarnish it.

 

It seemed they both may be about to confront their demons.

 

“I haven’t been back here since that night.”

 

“Me either.”

 

Felicity looked surprised. “This is your place, though.”

 

“After that night, I couldn’t…” he trailed off.

 

“Couldn’t what?”

 

He’s honest, needs to be. “I couldn’t come back here after I ruined the best thing that had ever happened to me,” he pauses, searching for eloquent words that fail him, “It was too hard.”

 

She nods, but she still looks confused. “So… why’d you do it?”

 

He sighs, taking a seat on a log and nodding for her to do the same. She shakes her head, crossing her arms over her chest protectively.

 

_Ouch. That stings._

 

“Look, Felicity, I know that I owe you more than an excuse, or a flimsy explanation but, I just need to you to know how sorry I am, again.”

 

She doesn’t respond, just continues to stare at him expectantly and he realizes she really isn’t going to help him here.

 

“After kissing you goodnight and leaving for my bunk, I was, well, euphoric. I felt like I loved you so much, I know you might have trouble believing it, after everything, but it’s true. It all happened so quickly, you know? That can’t be normal right? To fall in love with someone to the point where the future scares you? After only a little over a month?”

 

“So… you were scared?”

 

“No. I mean, yes. I was stupid, Felicity. I was laying there in my bed and thinking about how much it was going to suck to leave camp and not have you with me all of the time. We spent everyday together here at camp and I don’t know. It just - I was afraid of what it was going to feel like to not be able to wake up and bring you coffee in the morning. Or just to see you in passing, anything. I just thought it would be easier to stop everything then, rather than to prolong the pain for either of us.”

 

She’s silent, processing. He watches the emotions play out over her face. Anger, frustration, sadness, back to anger. She goes through it all.

 

Finally, “I don’t know what to say, Oliver.”

 

He nods. “Can I ask you something?”

 

“Sure.”

 

“Why - why didn’t you try to stop me?”

 

“What?” She breathes.

 

“When I told you it was over, you just… you let me walk away. And I know - I know I have no right, but Felicity, I knew I had made a mistake the second I turned around.” He looks down. “I guess I just hoped you would try to change my mind.”

 

Her mouth opens and closes, at a loss. She moves then, sitting next to him on the log.

 

“I was in shock, Oliver. I had just had one of the best nights of my life, had found someone I thought… only to have everything fall apart before my eyes. I was scared too but you know what, at least I didn’t throw the towel in!”

 

“Felicity…”

 

“No! Maybe I should have fought harder to stop you from being a coward but I was hurt, Oliver! You just…” Her eyes pool and Oliver feels his heart drop into his stomach. Fuck.

 

His hand reaches out on it’s own accord, rubbing her arm slowly, as he’s honestly kind of afraid she might hit him. “I’m sorry, Felicity. I’m so, so sorry…” His voice is soft and he watches as one, two tears trail down her face. He pulls her to him with a groan, his arms sliding fully around her body in a warm hug. She stills momentarily before squeezing him back, her face buried into his neck.

 

“Baby, c’mon… stop crying, please. I’m so sorry.” It’s a mantra he can’t let go of, repeating it over and over into her ear as they sit burrowed together on the log.

 

He doesn’t know how long they sit there, wrapped in each other. Eventually, he hears fireworks beginning to pop in the distance and he pulls away slowly, cupping her face in his hand.

 

“Are you okay?”

 

She nods, wiping away the remaining moisture from her cheek. “Yeah, I’m okay.” It’s a whisper.

 

Her head turns towards the fireworks, and Oliver feels his heart re-start in its chest as her head finds it’s way to his shoulder. He doesn’t let go of her, can’t, and is gratified by the fact that she seems to feel similarly.

 

His hand slips into hers as they watch the lightshow in front of them and when she curls her own fingers around his with a light squeeze, he thinks, yeah, maybe they will be okay after all.

  
  


_**FIN** _

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading - please let me know what you think!
> 
> You can find me on tumblr at /olicitee.


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